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Book of the Bokke - Chapter 1
Book of the Bokke - Chapter 1
(...on the Springbok losses to Wales, NZ and Oz)
1 And it happened that the mighty Mallet and the wise Solomon were called by their Creator.  And thus they arrived at the pearly gates and they knocketh and asked to enter and were answered by St. Peter.  And St.Peter saith to them, "Oh Mighty Nick and Wise Solomon, why haveth thee the worst Bok record of defeats in memory, especially against the weak and lowly Pommestines, let alone the strong and frightful Zealandites and Ozzerians?"
2 And then mighty Mallet and wise Solomon did answer to  St.Peter and they saith: "It is not the fault in us, St.Peter, but  in one Gary the Teichmanite, even though he did fight in just two of these battles. And of the Zealandites, they cheateth and we are thick before them and by their wiles and guile they did smite us 28-0 but only because we are too thick to cheateth like them. And then again St.Peter were are young and grievously injured and the fault lies in our warriors and not in our preparations and prophecies."
3 And St.Peter saith to them: "And have ye any recourse, not that the perils of the Cup of The World are upon the children of Bokkeland and approacheth with great speed? How shall ye deflect the might of the Zealandites and, as I seeth it on my video, maybe even the Caanadianites or the Caledonians if ye carry on like this?"
4 And wise Solomon answered St.Peter thus: "We shall go to a land called Provincialis and thus there we shall find a player and he is called the Skinstite; and he shall slay the Pommeranians and the Ozzerians and all the enemies of the Bokke and it be as simple as that".
5 And then St.Peter became filled with wrath and he blasted them thus: "Oh ye foolish coaches. Hath thou not learned that thou hast become thick and predictable and all the other coaches of the world shall smite you? Why hast thou cast out Jake the Whitey, who could have saved you by teaching you to run against the Pommeranians and Caanadianites and even the tribe of the Froggites if thou wished it? Oh ye shall not enter the kindgom of the Cup of the World until ye stop blaming others and pray hard that ye shall stop producing such damm boring rugby".
6 And at that mighty Mallet and wise Solomon were downcast and realized that soon their heads would be upon the platters, yea even as the enemies of the Bokkie's heads were once delivered to them in days gone by".

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Hmmm...  It seems St Peter wears a Springbok rugby jersey and scarf!   But wait... isn't that a black flag with a silver fern I see fluttering on a pole outside God's mighty house?

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