Friday, 23 Aug 19:35
Wop-Wops vs Dorkland
Whangarei
Already you might have noticed one of the special NPC features - team names are a little different to what you are used to. Don't worry, you shouldn't have any trouble working out which team is which; but if you're a real dum-dum you can ask on the message board. Anyway! The game - the city slickers lost to the 'Naki last week and they can't really afford to lose this one as well, especially considering they haven't even played the other big provinces yet. I'd fancy the wop-wops though, they beat the mighty dorks last year and this year they're at home. The wop-wops lost in the first round at Carisbrook by 9 - nothing to be too ashamed about there. With those very fast Fijian wingers and Glen Taylor leading a hard-nosed foward pack the dorks may find themselves in a spot of bother. I'm picking the dorks, but only just. They really can't afford to lose if they want to make the semis - they may be hungrier. Go for the safe option of "Dorkland by 8-14"
Saturday, 24 August 14:35
Oyster Chompers vs Windy Wet Wastelands
Invercargill
OK, OK. The chompers beat my wastelands last year - but it isn't going to happen again! We ought to have our All Blacks and maybe a few of our injured back wheras the Oyster Chompers, well, they'd be thrilled to stay in Division 1 let alone play in the finals. Seriously though - the Lions should obliterate the upstart Southerners. Windy Wet Wastelands by more than 21.
Saturday, 24 August 17:35
Dairy Farmers WITH Bells vs Northern Dorkland
Hamilton
This should be a close one. Both of these teams got maximum points from last weeks' games against the relegation candidates but neither looked particually convincing. The Farmers with Bells have many injuries, wheras the Northern Dorks looked plain awful against the worst team in the comp in that second half against the Bay. Both sides desperately would like the win so they have some breathing space before they have to play Canterbury and Otago. I'm picking the Northern Dorks by 1-7 because they're not depleted by injury and are coming off a great season last year. The Farmers with Bells' one chance may as usual be the old "drive the opposition stark raving mad with cow-bells" trick.
Saturday, 24 August 19:35
Dairy Farmers WITHOUT Bells v Speights Guzzlers
New Plymouth
Yay! The amber and blacks sure shoved it right up those Dorks! Well, 23-20 is hardly a thrashing... but it's a hell of a lot better than what my team the Wastelands can usually manage. Can the Farmers without Bells back up and claim the prized scalp of the Speights Guzzlers? Good question! If they can then they stand a real chance of making the top 4 after beating two of the big five. Brendan Haami looked sharp for the Farmers last week. Daryl Lilley kicked well and we all know about the honest fowards they churn out because of the diet of cheese, milk and beef everyone around there is brought up on. Guzzlers played Northland and beat them at home in a dead boring match in Round 1. They were unable to gain parity in possesion in that match which must be a concern because their backs aren't too impressive when you take out Byron, Brown and Goldie. I say you go with your heart on this one! My heart says the Farmers by 8-14.
Sunday, 25 August 14:35
Bay of Old Timers vs Sheep Shaggers
Tauranga
Well I don't like to go on about it but the Sheep shaggers LOST last week!!! I haven't been able to say that since mid-September last year so I thought I'd better say it now unless I don't get another chance for another 11 months. I won't be able to say it next week, of that I am almost certain. The Shaggers will get back quite a number of their triumphant All Blacks this week as I understand it, and SHOULD crush the Bay. Accidents can happen as my boys found out last year, but surely not to the S12, NPC and Ranfurly Shield Holders. Sheep Shaggers by more than 21. P.S. - Did I mention that we beat Canterbury last week?
Standings after week 1
| Dairy Farmers WITH Bells | 5 |
| Northern Dorkland | 5 |
| Windy Wet Wastelands | 4 |
| Speights Guzzlers | 4 |
| ---------------------------------- | |
| Dairy Farmers WITHOUT Bells | 4 |
| Bay of Old Timers | 2 |
| Dorkland | 1 |
| Wop-Wops | 1 |
| Sheep Shaggers | 0 |
| Oyster Chompers | 0 |
